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Our life’s results and achievements are driven by our integrity

, February 15, 2022, 0 Comments

An interesting thing I learnt through my journey of personal exploration, growth and progress over the past 20 years or so was that so many of us ( including me at one point) struggle with issues of self-worth and

This generally shows up as varying levels or generally low levels of self-confidence in our day to day activities and dealings with others.

This issue of self-worth and self-confidence does not affect us much till it impacts us some day.. then starts impacting frequently, and then we may even start feeling frustrated for not getting what we think we deserve.

Also, this shows up as an inability to (or fear of) standing up in the face of life’s major changes, adversity and life challenges. 

Incidentally and unfortunately, we are often taught during our growing years to avoid unnecessary pain or challenges. And this in a way holds us back from developing our self belief , about having the capability to overcome challenges and succeed. 

The other thing that I learnt which  impacts our sense of self-belief and self-worth deeply, and mostly unknowingly is INTEGRITY.

INTEGRITY  means we always do what we say, no exceptions. Ever !

By extension, it also means that we say only and only what we mean at any time, in any social, professional or personal context, and then we do what we have said. 

And the surprising part is that we are often not even aware that over the years we have developed a very low integrity, and this is repeatedly impacting us in our day to day life.

People generally tend to think integrity is in the eyes of others, but it truly is in our relationship with our deeper self – our unconscious and subconscious minds.

This may be difficult to understand or believe, but is an absolute truth of life. The more we remain casual and non-committal or frivolous in our talks,  the more it impacts us adversely. 

We may think it’s okay to forget what we said casually in a social setting,  or promised ( committed unknowingly or deliberately) to avoid a discussion/argument or to defer a complaint/grievance from a child or a friend or partner or a relative. But it is not. Because every time we don’t live up to what we said, we lose trust with our subconscious and deeper self. And this keeps hitting our integrity,  which has a repeated and cascading impact on our self-belief, self-esteem and self-confidence, besides impact on relationships.

 When I started realizing this, it took me a while ( probably a year or more) to become aware about my ongoing integrity issues with my own deeper self. 

And then I spent conscious efforts, time and investment to work through the issues to reach the level where I am now – feeling more confident, having more self-belief, rising up to life’s challenges more frequently and doing things that I may have never imagined being capable of. 

I have overcome my own trauma related challenges, developed my capabilities and expertise as a life coach, hypnotherapist, Clinical Trauma specialist (for PTSD, grief, abuse), Anger reduction specialist and self-confidence coach. I  have been on TV interview panels, hosted radio programs, published articles in journals and magazines, traveled to and enjoyed several countries, relocated to a new country where I wanted to live and re-started life from scratch to again reach a high socio-economic as well as physical, emotional and mental wellbeing status. 

I have had so many mentors, coaches, guides all through, and continue having their support.

And this journey is continuing. I consciously put efforts to keep my integrity high all the time – I say what I mean, and do what I say !

It is a journey of deeper inner exploration, understanding, learning and transformation. The sooner we realize, seek appropriate support and help and start moving on, the better it is in our own life’s context.